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Grand Theft Auto V
November 18, 2013 - 3:34 pm
Member Since: April 19, 2009
Forum Posts: 1664
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GTA V - I mentioned it in a comment on the site a few minutes ago and it's rattling around my head a bit.

You know that feeling, you're at the dinner table with friends and conversation is happening, you know the night is about to wrap up and you're trying to collect your thoughts, organize them, and eventually speak without letting erupt a geyser of nonsense from your mouth. You have something to say, but it's also too much to say and it's all in point form.

That's the state of my thoughts on the game.

Has anyone else played it? I got it when it came out and played with it for about a week; I haven't gone back since, not on purpose or for any particular reason really, I've just felt like playing other games.

If anyone else has played it would you care to share your thoughts?

If I try to say what I want to say about the game it's going to come out like muddled word vomit. Maybe a forum conversation can circumvent that. (Or maybe not, we'll see!) I guess I should share an opening salvo of my own thoughts.


  • I hate the characters you play as. They're shit. Weirdly, the most over the top insane murder-y guy is the least offensive to me. He lives in a trailer park and is a gun-toting redneck personified. He's beyond silly. A lot of people acknowledged that he seems to be a conduit for the GTA player: he embodies the reckless, crazy behavior - the fun that is to be had from any past GTA games; doing stupid shit like running over pedestrians for no reason, etc. The other two characters are worse to me. The rich fully-aware-of-what-he's-doing gangster and the up-and-coming-wants-the-lifestyle gangster. They're worse somehow - because they're in denial about their shitty selves. Whereas Trevor the redneck understands what he is. Or does that make him worse? To think this deeply about it is a waste of time. They're all shit people and shit characters. If there could be only one in the game I'd go with redneck Trevor still. 
  • Everyone praises GTA and says "satire, satire, satire." Rockstar wants to make whatever the fuck game they want and then just call it satire. "Your game was terrible." "No, no, it was all satire, see." "OMG - I change my mind, your game is brilliant satire!" Fuck that. Can I walk up to someone on the street, shoot them in the head and then in court use as my defense "Murder? No, that wasn't first degree murder. I was satirizing the American Dream and our human condition." No, because that's insane. I don't think you can make fun of absolutely everything and put yourself so above it. Yeah okay there's a part where Rockstar makes fun of video game developers or some crap, but so what. They're not making fun of themselves. They think they're gods. How could the creators of such brazen work not think they're gods. Sorry Rockstar, you're not South Park. The satire doesn't work. There's no hope. It's all mindless 16oz slushee-guzzling vapid talk show radio. There's nothing else. What's the message, Rockstar? Everyone in America except Rockstar Games are mindless fools? Hmmm, no, I don't think so. Take a look in the mirror.


Rambling session #1 complete. I really hope someone else here has played GTA V so this doesn't end up a one person conversation. That would be quite sad!

If being wrong's a crime I'm serving forever

Subtropical Southeastern Michigan
November 19, 2013 - 12:54 pm
Member Since: April 10, 2009
Forum Posts: 3297
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I haven't played it and probably won't. As much as I'd like to give it a shot, I still remember my experience with GTAIV and I've never, ever played an open world crime game (except Crackdown, but that's different) that really held my interest or attention.

You're apparently not alone, xtal. Everyone I've read or spoken to agrees that the crazed trailer guy is likable, to some degree, and the others are either forgettable or horrid depending on who you ask. In a story and character driven game, it can't be stressed enough that the player must like, or identify with, or something other than despise, the character they're playing. That doesn't mean the character has to be "good" or anything. Garrett is a terrible human being and people loved him. Bachelor Dankovskiy and the Haruspicus from Pathologic are, respectively, an egomaniacal dropout from the film Malice and a thuggish brute with a scalpel, but they fit themselves like gloves and you find yourself slipping into them. Even Gordon Freeman, who doesn't speak, somehow has a character that's likable.

If you can't stand the people you are, there's a bit of a problem there.

As to satire... they tried the same thing with Far Cry 3. "Your game sucks." "It's satire!"

Looking forward to hearing more rantlets.

Life is the misery we endure between disappointments.

Synonamess Botch
Texas, y'all
November 19, 2013 - 4:47 pm
Member Since: November 9, 2010
Forum Posts: 1102
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There's no "nodding head to signify that I'm a good listener" smiley, so here are a few for a collective approximation:


In case I'm being too subtle or obtuse: keep 'em coming Xtal!  I've never played a GTA game and have no real desire to, but I'm sort of fascinated by discussions about them.  And pirates.


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