Oooh, I haven't used cardboard box deliveries even though I bring a cardboard box on every mission. Never realized that Mother Base even had a box delivery system. The things you learn!

I like Pequod, he's very intent on his identity. He begins every statement with THIS IS PEQUOD, even if he just identified himself a second ago. And I'm like, dude, you're the one helicopter pilot we have. I know your fucking name. Of nearly 500 people on this base, I know the names of three and yours is one of them. Stop telling me who you are. You already distinguished yourself by not being named Adjective Animal like "Glass Hornet" and "Substantial Blowfish."

Interestingly I tried to play a little Bloodborne last night and got my ass kicked because I'd become muscle-memoried to the Phantom Pain controls and... they're... they're quite dissimilar. Around the eighth time I killed myself by summoning more quicksilver bullets when I'd meant to switch to another primary weapon I decided to call it a night.

Depending on how things play out, that doctors-killed-as-fuck scene is either really well-directed or really poorly-directed. The camera deceives, and I'm still waiting to find out whether and how it did so in those opening minutes. What you see from Snake's bed (later the floor), it's filtered through perspective. As Magneto said, "Are you sure you saw what you saw?"

When the doctor produces a handgun just seconds before the special ops ninja garrotes him, it... looked... I... seemed... it... it suddenly felt like he was probably possibly going to maybe shoot me. 

He's prevented from maybe doing that by SpecNinja's piano wire, and then the SpecNinja is Quiet -- or what Quiet had been before -- and then the imaginary hospital roommate arrives -- with the bandaged face and Kiefer Sutherland's voice and Snake not having a roommate -- and douses her with... what, iodine? Even if it were rubbing alcohol she wouldn't have gone up like a Roman candle, necessitating a premature beeline to the window and leaving you/Snake alone in a burning hospital with a man who isn't there.

I'm dying to see if it all comes together and I hope it does in a way that makes sense. I just unlocked Quiet for missions, but this is those rascally developers objectifying women again. If she needs to maximize exposed skin to survive, she'd do better with a pair of shorts, strappy sandals, and a tactical vest with nothing underneath. But I doubt their priority was dealing with Quiet in a realistic way.

Quiet takes some getting used to as a battle buddy. D-Dog refused to take any initiative whatsoever and wouldn't even leave your side without an order; Quiet, meanwhile, pretty much does her own thing to the point where she's always shooting people I'd been meaning to Fulton out. I haven't quite gotten the hang of using her yet, to the point where I might go back to D-Dog.

One of the very few complaints about R&D in this game is that so few of the weapons you develop are actually of any use in the field (though when FOBs unlock that might change). But it does a good job making you always struggle for money, manpower, and living space. You never have everything you need and unlike many games, you never seem to reach a tipping point where money isn't a problem any more.

The Phantom Pain is strangely light on story exposition, given how MGS4 ridiculed for its forty-minute cutscenes. I'd actually prefer a little more than what it gives you -- you tend to do five or six side missions between every main one, so it breaks up the story into little vignettes. I'm still in the early 20-percent range, so there must be quite a lot left.

Kaz needs to reconsider his line of work, maybe go into something solitary like painting. Was he cheery and gregarious before the helicopter crash? Or was he always a chronically angry and insufferable douchewicket?

I'm just saying. I don't like kids either, but I don't go around hitting them with my cane. Even if I had a cane I wouldn't make a habit of striking terrified children with it. Honestly I'm amazed he didn't accuse them of being with Cipher. He's obsessed with Cipher. Every conversation, Cipher Cipher Cipher. Also he growls too much. I mean Snake is kind of growly, sure, but Kaz takes it to the extreme. Look buddy, we're all mad at Cipher. I was on that helicopter too you know. We still need to work with people.

At least Ocelot is hanging around to inject some levelheadedness into the equation. If he leaves the base I'm quitting this game. I can't imagine being stuck alone on an oil derrick with Kaz.