Up-front trigger warnings make me dubious. They often read like attorney-mandated ass coverage instead of any actual effort at sensitivity. I tend to mentally translate them into the most sarcastic, least considerate reading I can imagine. Thus in my brain, the one preceding Hellblade: Senua’s Sacrifice goes like this:

This game has crazy people, so FYI if you’re a crazy person or if crazy people make you sad. Also check out our website. Because hellbladehelp.info is totally what you’d visit to learn about mental illness.”

I mean come on. As disclaimers go, it’s not even comprehensive. What if Hell makes you sad? Or blades make you sad?

Look, I know it’s the end of March. Does that matter? Does that mean last year didn’t happen? Some of us just wanted an extra three months to keep hunting for shrines, and to keep reaching for those elusive chicken dinners.

You died. Alone. Because there was no one to touch your bloodstain. Because the servers are going offline. So there won’t be online features. Get it?

Hello, Tap-Repeatedly –

I wanted to write an actual roundup of games I played in 2017 – there were a lot of good ones – and I promise that I still will. But today I am merely stopping by to direct your attention to others. This hashtag that I’ve seen on Twitter over the last week fills me with joy. I must bask in it.

#Girlsbehindthegames

Some people seem to be favoring #womenbehindthegames, and that’s also totally fine.

Why is this so, so important to me? Please click on it. Either one. Both.

In our final episode of Side by Side Joel and I take a look at Metanet Software’s triple-distilled platformer, N++.

Hi Tappers, quick news update –

This weekend, I’m going to be on the floor at PAX Unplugged, the first PAX event to be held in my hometown of Philadelphia!

The event kicked off with a Storytime session with Wizards of the Coast President Chris Cocks. He talked about his journey in game development, how he went from working on Halo to working on Magic and D&D, and showed some previews of upcoming projects (anyone for a game of Betrayal: Legacy? Because I’m very down with that combination).

On Saturday, I’m heading up a panel of very talented women in the Women of Tabletop Game Design panel! If you’re at the event we’ll be speaking at 4 PM!

And on Sunday, at 1 PM EST, our plan is to livestream Dungeons & Dragons right here from PAX. Tune in on Twitch to watch our campaign! And then, stay tuned here after that for more detailed updates after the show!

“Hello, please leave your message after the beep.”

“Hi, this message is for 1998 and 2007. I just wanted to tell them to go fuck themselves.”

The requirements for playing Die Gute Fabrik’s Johann Sebastian Joust (or ‘JS Joust‘, or just ‘Joust‘) are high. You need the game which comes bundled with Sportsfriends, the local multiplayer compilation that Joel and I covered in Side by Side season 1 quite extensively, you need a PS4 or a computer running macOS or Linux, you need two or more PlayStation Move controllers, and you need space. Oh, and friends –physically present friends– let’s not forget those. As such, and despite owning Sportsfriends, I’ve never been able to play a real game of Joust.

Until now.

Yesterday, in an Extra Life encore, I finished The Last Guardian. I just want to type those words again.

I finished The Last Guardian.

This week Joel and I are the men who stare at goats. And barley. And clay, and bowls, and beer and various other things related to Studio Wumpus’ Sumer.

Quick heads-up: I think this is one of the best episodes of Side by Side.