A couple of days ago I posted up a link to Life is Hard, a short satirical flash platformer that had me chuckling away for a good few minutes. My girlfriend was at work when I spotted it so she didn’t get a chance to give it a whirl. Anyway, yesterday while I was at work Hazy popped up on Gmail and I pointed her over here to check out the game (and my first post!!11). The following exchange ensued:
me: Did you play the game?
Hazy: Nope, will do though.
me: You should, it’s great.
Hazy: Okay, I’ll do it now.
(a few minutes later)
Hazy: Fuck me, I can’t do it, the bloody little man keeps falling off the platforms or jumping too late.
me: Just keep going.
Hazy: I can’t get on the mushrooms.
me: Come on!!
Hazy: It’s terrible.
me: You’re terrible. Do it!! Are you trying to get from left to right? Or trying to get the coins?
Hazy: You can’t reach the coins Gregg! He’s falling short of the platforms all the time or jumping after I press it and it’s too late.
Hazy: I can’t even go from left to right.
me: The platforming is crap but it’s not that difficult!
Hazy: I can’t get on the second mushroom, I’d rather play Facebook. You have to jump way before he gets to the end of a ledge or else he walks off then jumps.
me: I can’t believe it’s causing you that much trouble!
Hazy: The controls are shit!
me: Hey it’s not Little Big Planet! This is a thirty second exercise! The pay off is going to be totally underwhelming now.
Hazy: Finished it. And it was underwhelming. I should have just watched you play it.
me: Bloody hell!
Hazy: I’m not a born gamer.
me: Hahaha, you were crap at You Have To Burn The Rope!
Hazy: Now you know why I stick to puzzle games!
me: I think you should never touch a platformer ever again.
Hazy: I think you suck.
So there you go.
Today’s lesson: if you’re no good at You Have To Burn The Rope stick to Facebook.